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providing the discerning homeschool mama with support on her journey

ENORMOUS BONUS of HOMESCHOOLING: Structuring Education NOW to Meet Career Goals

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There are so many advantages to homeschooling our children.

We get to choose what curricula to use, when to bump up a level and when to back off.

We get to do Bible every day, math every other day and history twice each day {if we want.}

We get to structure our days exactly how it works best for our kids. We can start late in the day and teach through dinner. Or we can start at 6am and be done before The Price is Right comes on. 

We can pursue something unique that triggers our kid’s fancy, we can alter what we read in books or we can skip topics altogether. 

We are blessed to grow extra close relationships with our kids all the while helping them learn and grow and mature. 

But, another MAJOR benefit that recently struck me as an ENORMOUS BONUS that cannot be matched via any other educational option is

being able to structure their education NOW to meet up with their career goals LATER in life. 

I only have one example to offer but I am completely and utterly positive that there are a gazillion examples of how to make this work for YOUR KID.

Our son, who is now 12, has wanted to be a zookeeper FORbasicallyEVER. 

Now, a LOT of kids like animals and many seem to really LOVE them so none of this surprised us. We catered to his likes by visiting zoos in multiple cities and states, taking him to live animal shows and watching several reality-based zoo shows as a family.

Like most parents, we unconsciously assumed he would change his mind, but, his childhood dream hasn’t waned at all. He simply wants to be a zookeeper. 

While he was in the middle of his Seventh Grade year, my husband decided to begin researching the path to zookeepering. And, one of the biggest surprises that we discovered was the suggestion {made by many renowned professionals in the field of animal keeping} that young adults need to have SIGNIFICANT VOLUNTEER TIME under their belts before they can even begin to dream of applying for a paid zookeeper gig. 

Now, I’ll admit. This suggestion of SIGNIFICANT VOLUNTEER TIME gave me visions of a college graduate living in my basement for years while he schlepped down to the local animal shelter or maybe shoveling stalls at a nearby farm. 

But then I had the realization that this kid of ours can start volunteering NOW. He’s only 12. But he has the time and he has the dream. So, I did some quick thinking (not a lot of options in our smallish town, which is located no closer than 90 miles from an actual zoo,) and I landed on our local museum that just so happens to have

two giant tortoises

an alligator snapping turtle, 

an alligator gar, 

more snakes than I want to acknowledge, 

one bat, 

several frogs and toads,

two chuckwallas, 

a couple of water monitors, 

a pair of red slider turtles

and about 1000 mice

{because they purposely breed them to feed everything above.}

So, I made some calls on Wednesday, our son had his first ever interview on Friday and he began “work” Monday morning at 9am!

He now spends about 6-8 hours each week helping care for this menagerie of animals and working toward his dream job!

I could write an entire post on the benefits of this experience {and I probably will} but the point of this post is this…

He’s ONLY 12 years old and is actually actively working towards his career goal!

I think that is an ENORMOUS BONUS of homeschooling! Don’t you?

The kid’s first day at “work”

Stop saying, “WE’RE ALL JUST DOING OUR BEST,” because I’m not! Are you?

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I wish moms would just stop saying, “We’re all just doing our best,” because I’m certainly not! Are you?

I heard it again just yesterday. Or, rather, I SAW it several times in a series of comments in a FaceBook group for homeschooling moms.

“She’s just doing her best,”

“Stop. The Mommy Wars. We’re all doing the best we can.”

“We need to show more support for one another. We’re doing our best!”

And, yet, I wonder, “are we?”

I know for darn certain that I AM NOT.

Sure, I have some uber duber super duper days.

I usually take charge of Monday and own it like a boss.

I’m up early. My lesson plans are all prepped. The kitchen is spotless. The laundry is whirling away. The carpets are vacuumed. The kid is on task. Nobody is yelling or crying. I’m even dressed (including a bra) and actually answer the door when the UPS man arrives. I have meals planned. It’s all good. I AM DOING MY BEST!

But, by Thursday little of that fabulousness remains. No bra. No home-cooked meals. No clean carpets. Those things have been replaced with short tempers from everybody, Hot Pockets for lunch and Hulu in the middle of the day.

I KNOW how to own my days. I KNOW what it means to do my best. I do! I did it on Monday and Tuesday…some weeks I even rock Wednesday too.

So, what happened? It’s not like I forgot. And, truth be told, it’s not like anything changed. I just got tired and, frankly, more than a wee bit lazy. While sitting on the couch in my day pajamas, I will contemplate all I need to do but am NOT doing. I have the time. I have the knowledge. I just don’t have the energy. Or the desire. Or the gumption. I’m not sure what to call it. 

Call it whatever you want, but it sure isn’t  MY BEST.

Now, I know most moms, ESPECIALLY homeschool moms, have way more on their figurative plates than I do* with more kids and actual jobs but I still wonder if “we’re all just doing our best.” I honestly believe that, for the most part, the truth is we’re not.

WE ARE NOT DOING OUR BEST.

If you rang my doorbell on Thursday at 1:30pm, you’d probably find me braless and drinking coffee with unbrushed teeth and my hair in a blob on my head.  You’d find my kid wearing the same clothes that he wore to Youth Group the night before, eating Doritos while watching You Tube on the iPad. There’d be dishes in the sink, cat fur on the carpet and laundry on the kitchen table. 

Are any of those things HORRIBLE enough to warrant a call to Child Protective Services. Of course not. But, are they MY BEST?

Good golly, no. 

If I actually answered the door and let you in, I’d apologize for the messy everything  and you’d brush it off and say, “Oh. It’s fine! You should see MY house. No worries. We’re all just doing our best.” And then we’d laugh and pretend that was true. 

But, if that was true, my Thursday would look like my Monday. 

If that was true, dry shampoo would not be on an auto order with Amazon.

If that was true, they would not recognize us at the McDonald’s drive-thru.

If that was true, my husband would not need to remind me to put gas in my car before I run out again. 

If that was true, I wouldn’t avoid the bathroom scale like I do WalMart on a Sunday. 

If that was true, the kid would not have a pile of incomplete school work labeled “Summer Stuff”. 

Instead of saying, “You’re just doing your best,” maybe we need to be brave and bold and say, “While you binge watch The Handmaid’s Tale this weekend, why don’t you fold some laundry? Eight piles on the kitchen table really isn’t okay.  Everybody, including YOU, will appreciate it.”♥

Or instead of ignoring your child’s rude interruptive behavior at co-op because you’re “just doing your best” and taking a break while chatting with another homeschool mom, you actually break away from the conversation and redirect your child’s behavior.♦

Or perhaps instead of perusing FaceBook for hours each day, you actually sit down and plan some meals. McDonald’s won’t be happy but your husband, bank account and BMI will be.♣

Now, I’m not saying we all need to start openly calling one another out on doing our best. I’m not saying that at all. That would do nothing but ramp up the Mommy Wars and create loads of resentful, angry women.

But, I AM suggesting that we start calling out OURSELVES. Ask yourself, “am I really doing my best?” 

And, MAYBE, after your answer is consistently “YES!” you can then broach the subject with your BFF. Maybe. 

*{It’s tough to beat how much I have on my literal plate though! I LOVE food!} 

♥{True story, basically but with a different series every weekend since I finished Handmaid’s Tale long ago.}

♦{Totally true story except for the days I was teaching co-op because it’s hard to gossip with other moms while teaching a group of kids.}

♣{Oh my! 100% true story but with Freddy’s and Q’Doba mixed in too.}

The Three Biggest PERKS to Homeschooling an ONLY CHILD

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What are the BIGGEST PERKS to HOMESCHOOLING an ONLY CHILD?

Many of my homeschool friends have GOBS of children and they probably believe that having only one child makes for GOBS of PERKS for this homeschool mama. Truth be told, there don’t seem to be as many perks as it may seem. As a matter of fact, there are several challenges to homeschooling an only child.

{READ OTHER POST “Biggest Challenges of Homeschooling an Only Child”}

But, I won’t deny the fact that there are, in fact, MANY PERKS too! Here are what I consider to be the TOP THREE PERKS to homeschooling an only child.

ONE: INDIVIDUALIZED EDUCATION  This may seem entirely too obvious but there are multiple perks within an INDIVIDUALIZED EDUCATION. 

Besides the fact that I get to spend ALL OF MY TEACHING TIME on my one son,

I also get to spend more time and money CHOOSING the VERY BEST CURRICULA for him. 

I need to deal with only ONE LEARNING STYLE and 

I am able to adjust MY TEACHING STYLE to meet only his needs!

I DON’T HAVE TO WORRY whether it’s legal to make additional copies of workbooks and

I can readily make changes to his lessons whenever I need to.

I need to AGONIZE over ONLY ONE FOREIGN LANGUAGE and

I do NOT HAVE TO TEACH (potentially boring) things MORE THAN ONCE. 

There is only one kid who gets sick so the FREQUENCY OF SICK DAYS IS LOWER and 

I do NOT NEED TO WRANGLE and WRESTLE distracting toddlers. 

I GET TO CATER to only his EXTRA-CURRICULAR ACTIVITIES and 

I even get to HELP HIM WORK TOWARD obtaining his CAREER GOALS NOW!

[READ OTHER POST “ENORMOUS BONUS of HOMESCHOOLING: Structuring Education NOW to Meet Career Goals”}

TWO: EXTRA CLOSE RELATIONSHIP This is a perk for any mom of an only child but it is even more so for the mom who is homeschooling an only child.

Most homeschool moms will claim a HIGHER LEVEL OF CLOSENESS with her kids over the relationships bound by public school hours and stress, but the fact is if you have eight kids, you simply cannot create more time in your day than a mom of one.

The UNIQUE CLOSENESS of a homeschool mom and her only child is simply a natural result of the amount of time spent together compounded by the high quality of those experiences.

THREE: QUALITY TIME As any mom of multiple children will tell you, it’s exhausting to get all of the kids to complete their schooling, naps finished, bodies dressed, snacks packed, potty-needs addressed and everybody in the car in order to make it to co-op class, dentist appointments, the grocery store, park playdates, lunch with Daddy, story time at the library, etc.

But, with one kid, the possibilities of what you can do in one day are nearly endless!

Picnic in the park!

Visit the local museum!

Matinee movie at the theater!

Bike ride around the neighborhood!

Early bird special at a fancy restaurant!

Pitch a tent and take a nap in the backyard!

Hang out at the library before it’s overrun with after-school kids!

Make new friends at the nearest nursing home!

Make a new creation at the pottery place!

Volunteer at the local animal shelter!

Surprise Grandma at her house!

Day trip to the zoo!

As any homeschool mama knows, homeschooling has some of the most beautiful benefits but HOMESCHOOLING AN ONLY CHILD has some perks that can ONLY be found at home with you and your only child. I encourage you to consider it. And if you are looking for support from other homeschool moms of only children, please join this FB Group for support!

(JOIN Lone Wolfe Homeschooling FaceBook Group}

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